One year later……

Taking time to reflect. This blog has been up for a year. Ive been walking this road for a year. I spoke with a friend about the past year ive spent in blogging…..the bumps and bruises…..scrapes and skirmishes…..the conflicts and comments….wow, id never thought id be here. Never thought my present would be so much better than my past. Ill never forget what someone said to me 8 months ago. A wise woman pulled me aside and said, “I wish I could show you your future God has shown me. Your life is not over….the most amazing part of your life is just beginning.”
   I was so deeply destroyed I thought she had accidentally spoken to the wrong person! I was respectful and said that I appreciated and heard what she was saying but inwardly I was saying this lady is off her rocker! Now, a year later… all makes so much sense.
If my life would have continued down the path it was headed…if I was married today, there is no way I could experience all the amazing things that are happening and are about to happen. I would have been so handicapped. What I saw as Dad failing me and not keeping His Word actually was Dad loving me too much to let me settle for a life that was so much less than what He created me for….to let me settle for being ordinary and mediocre when He created me to be exceptional and extraordinary.
   I started this blog because of my frustration with christians, as a whole, around me that were trying to force feed me church clichés and rhetoric that was totally crap. Only because they all were too lazy to commit to walking through the dark places of my hurt WITH me. They wanted the cheap easy way out. Speak a word, slap on some oil, quote a few scriptures, then blame my lack of instant deliverance on my lack of faith. I vowed to document every struggle, every day, every hurt so that those who come behind me on this road will have SOMEONE who have been honest about their grief, hurt,  depression and pain. So they wouldnt believe that they are crazy. A Christian that was honest about doubting Dad and that struggle.
   Here’s the kicker: I started blogging to heal, to vent, to help…..or so I thought. But I discovered that my year blogging was actually in His master plan to propel me into the life I thought was impossible. Ive been “practicing” for a year to be ready for my future work. Just amazing. I am simply flabbergasted.
    This anniversary bear marking. I needed to stop and reflect on how magnificiently Dads plan all unfolded. For my Bible scholars… last year I identified very closely with Naomi from the book of Ruth….she lost all if her possessions, her husband and both sons and had to leave the country because she was starving to death…….turns out im closer to what ive been called numerous times throughout my life by 100s of ppl from my childhood….David…..I was born a king….so was Daivid ….and no matter how how David or I ran off course and went horribly wrong….neither of us can, would or will shake our kingly attributes, royal destinies, monarchical dna…..I couldnt survive in the marriage I was attempting to force myself into anymore than David could survive being married to Bathesheba. God saved David from himself….Dad saved me from myself….even when I didnt behave like royalty…didnt change my dna.
     For my non-christian readers….if you are destined for greatness, your mistakes and failures do not stop your future…your failures are the foundation and stepping stones to the acceleration of your future manifesting itself. I saw last year as the complete destruction of everything I loved….but it actually was the garage sale of my life to rid me of everything that would prevent me from being mobile enough to live the amazing life that was right around the corner!
  Word for the day: perspective
    Happy one year anniversary guys…heres to another amazing year!


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s